Happy Easter! He is Risen!! Church was wonderful yesterday. It was decorated beautifully, everyone looked dapper, and the sermon was inspiring. Every holiday, every year I try to take a mental snapshot of the goodness, the blessings that we have to celebrate and hope I will always remember these years. In the joy of the day though, a part of me still felt more like Good Friday than Easter Sunday. Unfortunately my dad is not doing well and it’s been a painful experience to see someone so strong and healthy, deteriorate so quickly. He is a fighter, and we trust he will bounce back from this recent setback, but in truth, there have been many tear-filled nights lately. Watching someone suffer is always hard, and it’s a helpless feeling at times. Dad is back in the hospital and is expected to remain there for at least another week or so. We visit every day (although probably not for a few days with Garrett having a cold). After church we all piled in the van and did our best to cheer him up and celebrate the Lord’s resurrection with him.
Also not far from our hearts is Karolina. I have to say, I was not adequately prepared for this stage. I expected it would be very difficult to leave her, but every day has been heartbreaking. There has not been a night since we left her, that I haven’t dreamed about her. I dream she is crying for me, I dream we can’t get to her, and most bizarre, last week I dreamed I rode a big lizard across the sea to her. Ha ha! It might sound strange that the bond could be so deep after just a few days together, and I think that’s the part that most surprised me. I never anticipated that the attachment would be so complete, so quickly. She’s not just our adopted daughter we are waiting to pick up, she is my child, and I miss her. The reassurance I have is that she is in excellent hands and I know she is being well taken care of.
Over the weekend we colored Easter eggs and made one for my dad, and another for Karolina. Eggs represent new life, and I couldn’t help but think of the significance for both of them. Karolina’s new life will be a few short months away, and she will be introduced to a world of big brothers and a bulldog. I pray my dad will receive a new lease on life and no matter what happens, we believe the Lord makes all things new. Hallelujah, thanks be to God.
Julie says
Oh Brooke, my heart is breaking for you. Being in the midst of home study chaos (Wednesday is our big day) and having just lost my dad in the fall, I can totally relate to both of your struggles. I pray that the days pass quickly for Karolina's sake and slowly for your dad. I hope that God heals your dad, but if this is not his will, then my fervent prayer will be that God would grant him the blessing of Simeon in that he could hold the promised child (Karolina) in his arms before the Lord takes him home.
I will be lifting you up daily in prayer my new friend.
Gosia says
Congratulations Brooke!!!!!
What city is Karolina from? I think you made your other blog private, and I had no idea that you received referral 🙁
I am going to Poland next week to finalize my adoption 🙂
Please e-mail me when you have a second…. I would love to hear more about Karolina…
[email protected]
Gosia 🙂
Lee and Martha says
Hi Brooke,
Where have I been that I missed your first trip to Poland? I noticed you made your other blog private. I would be honored to follow your trip if you are granting permission. My e-mail is [email protected].
I remember leaving Adam and Aggie, it was such a mix of emotions because we were so sad to leave, yet so joyful in finally meeting our children. We will send many prayers your way for peace and a very very very quick turn around – Your pictures of the orphanage reminded Lee and I of Olstyn. Also, seeing Magda put a smile on our face. We worked with her and she was a dream. You are working with someone who has a wonderful heart and will take very good care of you. In addition, I can't ignore the situation with your father and am amazed by your strength with everything going on in your life. He will be on our prayer list too.